How (Educators Can) Win Friends and Influence People: Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

First, if you haven't read "How to Win Friends and Influence People", get it now! I wish I would have read this fifteen years ago! I as listening to mine on a book on tape on Audible.com. This isn't a promo. Amazon is giving me nothing, just that it is a very useful way to spend my drive time. And the Kindle edition is only two dollars at the time of me writing this.

As I read through Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People, I'm struck by how much is applicable to a teacher's life when interacting with the various stakeholders.

Organized into four sections, here is my take on the section entitled "Fundamental Techniques in Handling People". 

1. Don't criticize, condemn, or complain. Human nature does not like to admit fault. When people are criticized or humiliated, they rarely respond well and will often become defensive and resent their critic. To handle people well, we must never criticize, condemn or complain because it will never result in the behavior we desire.

• reinforces how important it is to refrain from negativity with our students so as not to break relationships with them

• reminds me also of interactions between teachers and school leadership. Sometimes leaders are critical, but I've also experienced perceived criticism when there was none. For example, in a PLC, an administrator asking the teachers (myself included) questions about our lessons. We were perceiving criticism when it was really the administrator trying to facilitate a reflection on our practices. When teachers perceive criticism, they will not be reflecting because they are instead becoming defensive. All the more reason administrators and coaches must take that time at the beginning of the year to set up an understanding that PLCs will require all in the group to assume positive intentions. 

• I was in a training one time and the issue of parents came up. My trainer said something to the effect of, "Children are like the billboards of their parents. They leave the house and they announcing what that family is about and how well those parents parent." I've often thought of this while talking to parents. So often it can go awry if parents perceive criticism of their child which equates with criticism of their parenting. Keeping things factual without subjective adjectives and adverbs and focusing on the actions are the issue, not the child himself can help make it clear it is not criticism of the child but notification about his behavior. 

2. Give honest and sincere appreciation. Appreciation is one of the most powerful tools in the world. People will rarely work at their maximum potential under criticism, but honest appreciation brings out their best. Appreciation, though, is not simple flattery, it must be sincere, meaningful and with love.

• specific feedback to students is important. A "good job" can sound insincere in a child's ear. Instead something specific, "I like how much you participated in class, it really contributed to the lesson" or "Thank you for coming in with a smile today."

• I appreciate the pinterest worthy teacher appreciation gifts, but as someone whose love language is not material goods, I get so much more out of letters and notes students write me. Likewise, administrators and peers flourish from positive feedback like this. Have a stack of blank notecards and endeavor to write thank you notes to staff. Keep a list of people you've written notes to. Has someone conducted PD for you and your fellow staff? Thank them. Does administration provide donuts at the faculty meeting or let you wear jeans? Thank them. Keep a list of your team members and write a thank you to each of them throughout the year.

3. Arouse in the other person an eager want. To get what we want from another person, we must forget our own perspective and begin to see things from the point of view of others. When we can combine our desires with their wants, they become eager to work with us and we can mutually achieve our objectives.

• ·         Putting ourselves in the shoes of students is vital in good lesson planning. What to students want? At the middle school level, many of them want options. They want to be treated with respect and for adults to treat them like they can make good decisions. They want to have choice. Have you ever let students design their own assignments? Try it, as a class, come up with an assignment explain what the standard is asking the student to do and then ask how the class thinks this can be accomplished.
• ·         I think this one is vital when developing PD. Too often teachers are geese being fattened for pate with information being forced down throats. It is one of the reasons I love problem-solution formatted PD. Teachers want things that are going to solve a problem so first you have to make them connect with or perceive the problem. If a PD presents a solution, there is an eager want from faculty.

What about you? Anything strike a cord?

Homework Alternative in a Learning Management System

New technology creates new opportunities, but how can we keep  ourselves from taking the technology and merely converting paper and pen tasks into digital ink? How can we use features in an LMS to change what we do, not just how we do things?

There are a couple key features to LMSs that offer an opportunity to embrace new and prepare students with 21st Century Skills.

Discussion Boards:
For a homework passage have students write 2 questions and 1 reponse on the text. Set the discussion board so that way students can't read anyone else's questions until they post their first question. This will keep them from merely copying questions. Additionally, if you see the same first question popping up from students, you know there was something confusing. Questions can be a variety: something they were genuinely confused by, something they are curious about that while related to the reading requires research, or an open ended question they think would stimulate conversation.

Model these three types in class and they request they do two different types. Provide sentence stems or sentence frames to help ELL or struggling students.

Something that you didn't understand:
I was confused when .... What did that mean?
Why did ....?
How did...?
What did the author mean by...?

Something that requires research:
I wonder....
How do you think...?


Open-ended questions examples:
Does this remind you of something from real life/literature?
Which character do you identify with and why?

Replacing Venn Diagrams: a deeper way to compare texts

Problem: Students are filling out a Venn Diagram comparing two texts and surface level, comprehension-based information is quickly filling it. Maybe 1 or 2 students show any depth of thought, and you are worried that not many kids are actually growing in their skills.

Solution: Throw out the Venn Diagram and begin with the depth with abstract concepts.

1, Create a mini-lesson introducing or reviewing abstract ideas vs. concrete details. I prefer a Nearpod "draw it" activity where students are circling. With BYOD, this can be collaborative.

Love the look of Mentimeter!

2, For the each text, create a class brainstorm list of all the possible ideas for each text. You could keep Mentimeter or Answer Garden.
this going in Nearpod collaborate feature or use

3, Now students find abstract concepts that are the same or antithetical - I use the metaphor of a coin: one side is heads and one is tails but it is really the same coin. Same thing with ideas: injustice and justice are just two sides of the same coin. - and put that in the middle column. Then they determine the theme (for narrative) or claim (expository/persuasive) that goes along with that text and write it in a complete sentence under "Text A/B" and then provide textual evidence. I always have students do this in pairs.

This is the graphic organizer I created to get depth in across text comparison. 

Blended Learning station: Use Office Mix or a screen casting for the mini-lesson. For brainstorming, set up a discussion board in Schoology with the setting in such a way where students can not see other responses until they themselves have responded. Use a collaborative Office 365 or Google Document for the application of the strategy for the graphic organizer. Use a resource like Common Lit for student choice in texts!